Crazy talk

There's a lot of talk going on in the China adoption world that has my head spinning. And there's plenty I'd like to say about it all and address. Instead of all of those thoughts spinning around in my head, I think there's no better place to put it than my blog. The place to find out information seems to be this person called the "Rumor Queen." Rumor Queen is a mysterious woman who stays anonymous for personal reasons, she reports rumors that come in related to China adoption and the China adoption community. She has quite a large following of people and I can tend to get "sucked into the vortex of insanity" as I call it sometimes. When things are good they are amazing and positive and supportive. When they are not so good, they are downright bad, mean spirited and negative. Sometimes you feel like you a "swirling in the toilet bowl" as I put it. 5 years ago when we went through this process to adopt there was no Rumor Queen. We just went on faith. And it was faith that got us through it all. Thankfully. What is happening right now is that there has been a couple of months of a very mild speed up in referrals coming each month. Those months were approximately 8 days of referrals. This month's (April) referrals are due any day. It will be a very small batch this month. Folks who post and comment on RQ (certainly not all, but some) are freaking out. Turning on each other, saying mean and hateful things and also speculating things that most likely are not true. There are days (not too many now) that I don't know how I can possibly wait any longer for my child in China. I ask God everyday to help me get through this and He does. Last night I was feeling a bit low about it all and when putting Grace to bed, Dan came in the room to say goodnight. I made a comment to him regarding the wait and how it could potentially be another 2-3 years longer. He said, "Gail, we will wait for as long as it takes." As...long...as...it...takes. In retrospect with all my infertility issues and the time we waited for Grace to arrive, it took 10 years to meet her. Do I think we will wait 10 years, no. The only way I know how to be with all of this, is to be positive and supportive to other people. We are moving forward, slowly but moving. I distinctly remember in the Summer of 2006, sitting in our SW's office and talking about adoption in general. I told our SW that adoption (whether it's domestic or international) is NOT for the faint of heart. It's a roller coaster, the highs can be just amazing and the lows so agonizing...so we wait and I take a break from the crazy talk...