Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Our little boy

Will is in Fujian province, which is right across the East China Sea from Taiwan.

A little about our William Michael. I want to be honest and forthcoming about him. William has a cleft lip (that was repaired in China) and a cleft palate. The lip will most likely have some more repair work done at a later date here in the U.S. The palate will be repaired after he is home too. William will also very likely need a bone graft done when he's older. Children with cleft palates have a very nasal quality to their speech and definitely have articulation issues. He will need speech therapy for a long time. He may need tubes in his ears. We will deal with all of this as it arises. The surgeries don't worry me. When we started the process to adopt about 2 years ago, a big reason as to why we didn't ask for a child with medical special needs was one little 4 letter word...Fear. My husband was afraid, and so was I in a way. Maybe with my medical background I know too much. Once I got past the fear I felt like we could commit to this little boy. My attitude now is that my medical background is an asset for William, I know the questions to ask and what not... and what to... worry about. I will be an advocate for him always. Having a child biologically or adopting is a leap of faith and I feel quite strongly that this child is meant for us. It is funny and wonderful that the path we think we were meant to go on changes a bit. I couldn't be happier that this little girl we were waiting for is really a little boy.

Will has been in foster care with the same family for about 2 years. He's been loved and doted on by 2 parents. Knowing what I do about attachment, it means that he can transfer that bond eventually to me and Dan. I have great empathy for the family that first loved him and cared for him and I can't imagine what they will go through when he leaves them. There will be lots of transitions for William and I don't expect it to be easy for him for quite a while. I think Grace will help tremendously. He will most likely follow her everywhere and want to do what she does. If any of you out there have adopted toddlers have suggestions, I'd welcome them. :)

7 kind words:

Denise C said...

I couldn't be happier for you Gail!!! What a blessing this little boy will be to your family!
Looking forward to following your journey very soon!!!

Story of our Life said...

No suggestions just lots of love and excitment for you!!

It was great to see/talk to you yesterday afternoon. I left feeling so much better than when I walked into that building!!! :) Thanks!!

Of course Grace being the beauty and love she is will be great.


Ashley said...

Gail, you are such an amazing person, and mom! I am so excited for your family. Keep us posted. I hope Will is home with you soon!

OH MY #6 said...

Hello my friend,

I think Will is the luckiest little man alive. His journey of transition will be difficult, but having all of you looking out for him, will be his saving grace.

Thinking of you lots.


Brandi said...

I think fear sometimes holds a lot of us back (I know that is the case with us).

I know Will is coming into the perfect family, and everything will work out just fine.

Grace is going to be such a big help...and a wonderful big sister!

suzanne said...

My Chinese relatives have the concept that 'our adopted children' are very lucky. This is not patronising but they compare their Western lives to those they had in China, and look at all the opportunities that are open to them. But I feel that we are lucky to have the opportunity to become parents this way and reap the benefits of having children.

Will is a lucky boy in the fact that he will have access to great medical care, but most importantly he is going to a great and caring family and wonderful big sister.

I hope you can be united as a family very soon.

LaLa said...

So excited for you..can't wait to follow along. What a blessing he will be to you and you to him.

Our daughter was in foster care too and I remember being so happy knowing she was being loved on but also worried about the transition and her poor foster family missing her ....

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